Keith Urban (Labor Day-job) OC: …to sell things. 1:56
“I’ve had a lot of crappy jobs. Wow! I don’t know about the worst job, oh, telemarketing. (laughs) I hated it! By all accounts, I was actually pretty good at it, and my boss was really upset that I wanted to quit, ‘cause he said you’d actually be pretty good at it, other than I was just too brutally honest. I was working for a company that at the time sold Franking Machines, which was a thing where – back then – you would put postal impressions on an envelope and send them out, instead of buying a whole stack of stamps. So, you had this thing called a Franking Machine and you’d pre-load it with a whole bunch of pre-paid for stamps. And you just put the envelope(s) in and (sound efx). So, if you’re putting out a whole bunch of mail from a business, it’s much better to get a Franking Machine, then have someone go to the post office all the time. I would have this whole long pitch about, ‘Hi, I’m Keith, blah, blah, blah, what volume of mail would you say you do every week?’ I was talking to this lady from a florist, and she was so sweet, and she goes, ‘Oh, I’d say I send out about three letters a week, love.’ And then I’m supposed to say, ‘Well, then you need a Franking Machine…’ (laughs) ‘cause it’s on the script, you know? I’m going, ‘I’m so sorry, you don’t need what we’re selling. I’m sorry to bother you.’ And she goes, ‘No, no, tell me about this. What are you selling?’ She was the perfect customer, and I went, ‘I promise you. You don’t need this thing. It costs a fortune. You don’t need it. You don’t need it.’ She goes, ‘No, but tell me about it.’ I said, ‘Honestly, I’m not even going to waste your time. You’re so lovely, but thank you so much. Have a great day,’ and I hung up. My boss was standing behind me (laughs), and he goes, ‘They all need Franking Machines. They all need…’ I was like, ‘She didn’t. I hate this job. I quit.’ And that was it. I wasn’t cut out to sell things.”